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[beeped]

Comments

[clussy]

Richie!

(That squawk of indignation though. If he was standing, one could practically hear him stomping his foot.)

...I thought maybe you were going to keep staying in the Greenery.

[beeped]

No, I-- I'm gonna come home. Is that still okay?

[He's pretty sure it is but now he's gotta check.]

[clussy]

Of course it is you idiot! (Enjoy going deaf in one ear.)

Do you need a personalized invitation?

[beeped]

Owwww! Eds how can I enjoy your sultry voice for the rest of my life if I get deaf before I'm fourteen.

[Who's pouting now?]

Yes. Absolutely. Where is it?

[clussy]

Richie! (A louder shriek. He is somehow more easily embarrassed than usual right now.)

It's right here.

(He proceeds to take a picture of his middle finger and send it to Richie.)

[beeped]

¡Ay, papi!

[He's laughing so hard right now.]

How do I RSVP?

[clussy]

(Another picture comes through. Eddie's connected his index finger to his thumb to form a circle and he's putting his middle finger right through that circle.

Saucy.)

[beeped]

Edward! [He sounds so scandalized.] Think of my poor baby ears.

[clussy]

Don't you mean eyes?

(Eddie at least sounds a little less upset than he did when he first called.)

[beeped]

Nope, my ears. I can't see shit anyway.

[After a beat.]

I'll come home soon, okay?

[clussy]

I'll try and censor myself for the future. Keep myself family-friendly.

(No he won't.

But oh. See. This softens Eddie considerably.)

Okay good. The fort is open for business so.

[beeped]

Oh good, 'cause I can't handle all that crude shit.

[There's some weird sounds in the background on Richie's end, then the sound of him running. Nothing to worry about here.]

Save me the best spot!

[clussy]

Of course not. You were raised to be a good Catholic.

(Oh my God. Richard.)

You got it, buddy. Consider it reserved.

(Eddie takes a picture. It's of himself with his good arm opened up next to him. He's got a dumb smile on his face. Kitty is also crammed in the picture because of course. Dogs make forts better.)

[beeped]

Exactly. Hail Mary, full of grace and all that jazz.

[Your best friend is nothing but trouble, Edward.]

Aw, Eds. You know how to make a guy feel special.

[Really, that's the cutest photo ever???? His favorite person, his favorite dog, his favorite blanket fort--]

Awshitgottagobye.

[There's no explanation, but he at least turns up about twenty minutes later, and it's clear he ran the entire way.]